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10 Awful Tattoos and What They Say About You
Tattoos are supposed to be a permanent, physical expression of yourself. Be it to commemorate a special time in your life or to remember a family member or friend, tattoos speak volumes about those wearing them. Consider this a helpful reminder that polishing off a 30-pack of Bud Light with a girl you met outside the anger management counseling center is not the best environment for tattoo planning. Below are 21 awful tattoos and what they say about the people wearing them, and serve as evidence that liquid courage leads to kids, and in some cases kids who ask their daddy why there are legs painted on or around the armpit.

The Huge Tribal

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Huge tribal tattoos signal insecurity and the need for validation. After all, what is a tribal tattoo if not an attempt to call attention to your juiced muscles? Since none of the people currently wearing them have ever belonged to a tribe, the designs are meaningless attempts to look tough.

Emo “Cut Here” Wrist Tattoo

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Nothing screams “teenage girl” like a “Cut Here” tattoo on your wrist. Getting this tattoo is a sure fire way to make sure nobody ever takes you seriously again. If you were really that deeply disturbed you would have scars, not tattoos. This tattoo marks you as a person who probably grew up in the suburbs and didn’t get enough attention from mommy and daddy, crying for sympathy from anyone who will ask about their “emotional issues.”

Nintendo Knuckles Tattoo

(source) Not only can this man not conceal his juvenile Mario tattoo, he chose to get these hallmarks of childhood gaming permanently printed across his knuckles. This tattoo shows that your social life is limited to LAN parties, and that your main hobbies involve controllers and a television. If there’s one sure fire way to let the world know that you are a proud nerd, this might be it.

Six Pack Tattoo

(source) This tattoo lets others know that you are out of shape and don’t give a fuck and have an incredible sense of humor and an affinity for double entendre. By the look of it, he had that tattoo when he was a little bit thinner and it has since been pushed up a bit from the girth of an ever expanding stomach. Pretty soon this guy is going to have to upgrade to a 12 pack.

Steven Colbert

(source) Most of us find Steven Colbert funny, but to get his face tattooed to you is taking it a bit too far. This tattoo basically says, “I care about current events, but only insofar as I can laugh at them.” When political climates begin to get serious, the bearer of this tattoo is no longer interested. The only proper case for getting this tattoo is if you are indeed Stephen Colbert and you want to up the ante from shaving your head

Pothead Dolphin

(source) Either this tattoo was a vision he had while smoking a ton of weed, or the dolphin is supposed to represent him on a typical day. Smoking weed on his ripped up recliner with a tribal tattoo and red bong, this tattoo is probably a reflection of how the wearer sees himself. Some people get tattoos to commemorate the things in their life that mean the most to them, this guy chose to get aquatic animals smoking pot.

Armpit Bush

(source) Not only is this guy letting the world know that he likes hairy stripper bushes, but he’s also saying he likes them to smell like armpit. This man’s tattoo also lets everyone know that the only time he gets laid is when he pays for it. After all, who but a hooker would stick around after seeing an armpit crotch on the guy they’re about to sleep with?

Connect The Dots

(source) This girl must have enjoyed 3rd grade art class far too much. Either she didn’t get enough play time as a kid, or she needed a permanent cure for boredom. Bus late this morning? Why not play some connect the dots! The problem is that, from afar, the unconnected dots look a lot like a skin disease.

Pabst Blue Ribbon

(source) Very few things scream “redneck” more than a Pabst Blue Ribbon tattoo. It is a cheap, made-to-be-chugged, American brew. Nothing about PBR is worthy of commemoration via tattoo, and anyone tasteless enough to dedicate skin space to such a cheap beer is letting the world know that their most cherished memories are of the moments before blacking out in dive bars.

Tribal Face Tattoo

(source) This tattoo says, “Rather than being here in this office, I should be in the jungle banging rocks together.” Not only does a full face jungle tattoo like this ruin any chance of getting laid you ever had, it communicates to everyone that there is something fundamentally off about you that you should want to wake up every morning looking like this. Say goodbye to serious jobs, too. Nobody wants George of the Jungle hanging around the water cooler every morning.

Eye Zippers

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Crying for attention gone wrong. These hideous and nauseating tattoos have forever ruined any chance at moderate attractiveness she might have had. Wearing what looks like permanent Halloween makeup, this girl looks like someone who should be jumping out at you on a haunted hay-ride. Few thoughts are more offensive than turning over and seeing that sickening ink on the pillow next to you every morning.