At this point of the pandemic, my significant other has seen every version of my natural hair that there is. And when I wake up in the morning, chances are, my bun is spilling over because my bonnet or scarf had fallen off.
While myself and many women can attest to waking up to our scarf on the next pillow, this Twitter user revealed she wakes up before her boyfriend to tend to her hair for that “woke up like this” effect.
Software engineer and proud member of #BlackTechTwitter user @whereisindya, posed a question on social media that led to a long thread of both women and men chiming in about bonnet behavior or lack their of.
In short, men revealed they really don’t care.
But there was one man, who admitted he appreciates a woman “fixing her hair” for him before he wakes.
To be transparent, I can relate to Indya’s sentiments. Before my natural hair liberation and abandoning what I thought I knew as a young woman, I certainly played into certain “pick me” stereotypes, which included always wanting to look my absolute best at all times for my ex-boyfriend. (Girl, I switched men a long time ago and he dun seen it all). My ex had only seen my natural hair (no weave or wig) on possibly one or two occasions. And I damn sure wasn’t wearing a bonnet or scarf during any sexual activity (I’ll still snatch it off before sex). I wanted to maintain this image of perfection and sexy because I thought keeping a man or doing everything in my power to be “picked” revolved around catering to what I thought a man wanted. Call it an awakening, but I made myself a priority before what my man thought of me and soon something as simple as wearing a bonnet in front of him didn’t seem that “terrifyin
Here’s what #BlackTwitter had to say about wearing bonnets.
Twitter Thread Questions Do You Wear Your Bonnet In Front Of Your Man? was originally published on hellobeautiful.com